Pochi Racing...?

On the CD single for Pulse comes game data for Pochi Racing, a small little video game featuring Mad's first true mascot Pochi, aka Digidog. It's a game that, despite its listed compatibilities, I was thankfully able to get running on Windows 7. The name says it all: race to the end, avoid weapons the enemies shoot out, and win!

   

As you begin the game, you're greeted with an ultra-fast animation of all four Pochi racers going across the screen, with a couple Mad-oriented messages similarly blazing through below. Check out the rules and you'll find... a rules screen I can't read, since it's in Japanese and all. Click the machines button and you'll find a listing of each racer, listing each car's weapon and driver.

Click on up to the options screen in the top dropdown menu (easy to find, since there's only two options in it) and you can toggle between the odd button configurations, game speed, and sound. Click ????? and nothing noticeable happens, other than it not saving your settings. Click OK, and most of the time, it saves your settings.

 

As you start the game, all you really need to do is hold up while the other racers are spazzing around the track. Avoid their weapons, and try to be the first to the finish line. (Due to the other racers' extra length, they have an unfair advantage over you at doing so if they're at the top of the screen.) You don't have a projectile weapon like they do, but you can ram into them from behind... although I wouldn't recommend it. There is no recovery time for either you or them after taking damage, and they can fire at you from behind, so you'll most likely die instantly.

Once you win, you're greeted to a victory screen where-

HOLY SHIT!!!!! BOOBIES!!!!!

Indeed, after you win a race, you're treated to a two-frame animation of boobs from Erika, the female robot on the cover of the single to Good Girl. And not only are you treated to one shot of boobs, there are four or five different Erika animations that are chosen at random each time you win, with varying degrees of boobage being shown. This provides a great deal of replay value to the game.

(And whether you win or lose, a "Game End?" screen comes up, along with a neat MIDI rendition of Pulse.)

The game itself is not designed too well, and has absolutely no appeal to anyone who isn't a diehard fan of Mad, but if you are, this is a good way to kill a minute or two. Here's a download link for the game data, less than a megabyte total.